The Perfect Anniversary

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She wore her wedding saree, red embellished with intricate golden thread work. Her thick hair was freshly washed and shampooed, she had let it open, the water from them dripping onto her naked shoulders; each drop kissing her flawless skin. The delectable butter chicken, his favorite, simmered on the stove; tonight had to be perfect. She dabbed a few drops of Dior Midnight Poison on her neck, the fragrance enveloping her like a cocoon. 

She toyed with the tube of lipstick before discarding it on her dressing table. No, mustn't go overboard and anyway he had always hated seeing her with makeup on. Downstairs, the bell rang and with a  final sweeping look in the mirror, she hurried to greet the one for whom she had always made the extra effort to please.

"Happy anniversary, Darling," her husband gave her the perfunctory kiss her on her left cheek as she opened the door. 

Making his way to the bathroom to take a shower, he left his work shirt on the floor. How she hated this habit of his, yet she never made a retort. Tonight must be perfect. Their sixth wedding anniversary. 

As she picked up the creased shirt, she pretended not to notice the lipstick stain on the inside of its collar. The shirt, like him smelled of sweat, a sickly perfume and betrayal. In the back drawer of her cupboard, the vial of deadly poison waited. Tasteless and odorless. This was just the missing ingredient she needed. She didn't want a mess on her hands; she liked things clean and neat. 

Tonight, after all, had to be nothing short of perfect. 

Glimpses

There are things that you can't put a name to. They come and go, like fleeting emotions. Labels that have to be chucked out.

Today, when I lie in bed with a sore throat, feeling cold and miserable, you come in uninvited, invading my thoughts. I can't help or control it and I know only too well that it would be stupid of me to even try. You are a torrential rain on days like these, pouring down incessantly. 

I expect foolishly to hear from you. Not that you would. But I hope against hope, against the better judgement of me. Days like these, I wish you were here. Days like these, I look for a silver lining. Days like these, I half expect to see your name flashing on my screen. 

Trouble in Paradise

Image Source: Caroline Knopf

In your indifference, I felt your absence

In your silence, those unspoken words

Heavy with meaning, lingering in the air between us

In your torture, I felt your pleasure 

Neglect was your weapon, tears were mine

Those few memories of us are now scarred 

Not that you cared, it was my burden to carry 

Sins of past, washed by the shore 

Maybe it was doomed right from the start

Hopes of saving resulted only in debris 

But the day you decided to leave

The day I lost you, that was when I found myself too

Linking this post to Magpie Tales - Mag 305. 

Dream or Nightmare

Wanderlust

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Exploring new places. Trying out different cuisines. Meeting new people. The symptoms are stronger than ever before. You, my dear, have gotten a bad case of wanderlust. 

Pack up your suitcases, take your camera and maybe some of those books that have been gathering dust on your bedside table. The notebooks that you have been meaning to write in; pack them too, you will need it. Leave behind those labels and boxes that are stifling you. 

Excess baggage is certainly not permitted. They are best left back. A solo trip, that's what you crave. 

Those shorts that have been bought and stuffed in the back of your cupboard because you never got around to losing that roll of excess fat, pack that too. Nobody is going to judge and certainly not care, this is your trip. Spread your wings and fly. And who knows, maybe, just maybe you may discover who you are. 

Wrong Turn

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Remember those mazes that you loved solving as a child? Where you have to make your way through and find the treasure? You know you have to reach the right place and there is only one way out. Sometimes you take a wrong turn and then you have to go back and erase your steps, in order to take the right one. What if that was not the way it was supposed to go? What if the wrong turn leaves you at the right destination? What if that was where you are meant to be, even though that was not what you had in mind or planned? What then? What then?

More than just another day

You kiss me goodbye before leaving my side. I am only half awake as I turn over and kiss you back sleepily. I hear you sigh one last time with my eyes closed. I turn over and crush my face into your pillow, on your side of our bed. It still smells of you and I snuggle underneath the duvet and it's almost like you never left. 

I can even feel the dent you left behind in the pillow along with a few stray hairs. After what seems like a long time, I finally feel content. I know you will be back. Just like how I know it in my heart that when we had said forever two years back, we had meant it. 

On days like these that you leave early, I miss our breakfasts together. How you would make me scrambled eggs, a bit on the runny side just as I liked while I buttered our toasts. Sometimes even burning them. I am a bad cook, unlike you. You can whip up dishes in a jiffy. And that's what had drawn me into you in the first place. How you paid no heed to the jokes and continued to do what you love. 

We had been reckless, eloping and getting married in secret. The photograph we had taken stands on our bedside table reminds of that night. Me laughing at something you told and you with your hands around me looking at me with an amused expression on your face. Of all the pictures that we have taken, this one remains by so far my favorite. 

A cold wind breaks through the window as I open my eyes. The bedroom curtains fluttering gently. That's strange. I remember locking the windows last night before going to bed. I climb out of bed and stare at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. Blood shot eyes staring back at me, disheveled hair. Another night spending tossing and turning. It has been this way since you left. 

There is still a faint whiff of aftershave above the bathroom sink. I refuse to believe what they tell me. How can you be gone when I can still feel your presence? Like today morning. There are days when I don't feel you for days on end. But you come back, you always do. Forever was what we promised. And promises are what you have always kept. I splash cold water on my water and for an instant, I think I see a shadow in the mirror behind me. It's gone before I wipe my face. 

You and me. Smoke and mirrors. Scrambled eggs and badly burnt toasts. Late night rides and long walks home. Messy hair and butterfly kisses. Forever and beyond.