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Why is it that we are always looking for something else even when we seem to have it all? Naina asked herself the same thing each time she looked at Adithya. He was kind, he loved her dearly; but yet the feeling that something was missing between them refused to go away. The thought stayed, lodged in the deepest corner of her heart.
Was it simply because she couldn't help but compare him to Ravi, her ex? Or was it the fact that the easy camaraderie that they had shared seemed missing when she was with Adithya? Either way, she knew that she had to make up her mind before it was too late. She couldn't bear the thought of breaking his heart. She knew only too well the pain that came with it.
Those endless days she had spent in bed. Those nights that she would roam about her house like a crazy person. The suicidal thoughts she had harbored in her heart at the thought of spending a life without Ravi. It was her art that had saved her. She took to painting to heal herself. To find some deeper meaning to life that deluded her.
In the process, she found that painting was something she enjoyed immensely. It was in her art class that she had met Adithya. She did not know why, but she began to enjoy his presence. He became a good friend when she needed one. He encouraged her to follow her dreams, to aim a little higher with each painting that she created. To make her believe that mistakes were fine. Add a few douses of different colors and the painting could be fixed. Like her life. It looked even better than what she had in mind when she had begun.
When Adithya confessed his love for her, she was taken aback at first. She did not want to risk getting hurt. At the same time, the thought of losing his friendship was unbearable. But he was patient with her, giving her space and time.
"Take your time. Even if you decide to say no, please do understand that our friendship shall always remain the same." His soothing words had assured her.
That day, as Naina took out her brushes and dipped them in the bright colors of oranges, reds and yellows and began stroking bold strokes on her canvas, the answer to her question came as clearly as the image forming before her eyes. She had always been looking for a better man, one who was perfect. Adithya was far from perfect, he was messy, he sometimes forgot their dates but it was with him, her racing mind always found solace.
And all of a sudden, everything made sense. Ravi shall always be a part of her, no matter how hard she tried to hide it. But it was Adithya who taught her that sometimes it's okay to be broken, to take time to heal and most importantly, to learn to accept reality and trust herself again. As she did her finishing strokes on the canvas, Naina knew that her future was going to be as bright and intriguing as the painting before her.
Linking this post to the A to Z Challenge.