Lost

Image courtesy: Google

The pain was unbearable. It came to me in spasms. It felt as though my heart was being ripped apart. If only the pain was physical. It has been twenty four hours since she went missing. My daughter. She was only five years old, still a child. 

They say she's not mine to lose. True, she may not have been born to my womb, but does that make her any less of my daughter? I can feel my husband's hands holding me, enveloping me in his warmth. But the chill refuses to go away. Reluctant to leave, it stays, holding me in its clammy grasp, refusing to let go. 

Where are you, my darling? Won't you come back and spread the light that has now vanished from my life? The police suspect that it was a kidnapping. The birth mother who had given her up when she was born, not willing to carry the burden of a child when she was still a child herself. But the past five years, was she haunted by your innocent smile, her shameful past?

When she came to see you, I had refused. I had wanted to protect you from the world. Or was it mere selfishness? I had seen the rage in her eyes then. The hurt, the helplessness. But I couldn't even bear to think that you would be taken away from me, even if it was through a mere glance. Of the thought that a selfish stranger would win your easy heart, your selfless love. 

Today, I hope you are safe. Where ever you may be. I pray that she takes good care of you. After all, she is your real mother. Does that make me fake? A make-believe mother? I'd never thought that I was capable of so much love till you came along. You conquered my world with your dimple chin and toothless smile. So much of love gushed for you from my heart. Love that threaten to destroy me, without realizing it.

Stay safe, my little angel. I shall never stop looking for you. You are a part of me. And since you left, the gaping hole in my heart keeps getting bigger. Know that you shall be loved till my last breath. You are missed. Deeply, more than words could ever say...